Infidelity, as one of the more challenging problems faced in a relationship, usually entails a traumatic response when discovered. Many people are completely caught out if they find out about a spouse or partner cheating. Some suspect infidelity because of actions that are out of the ordinary range of their partner’s behaviour.
Whilst this is not a definitive checklist, common signs of infidelity can include:
- Increased interest in appearance, buying new apparel, unusual choices
- A burst in fitness activity
- More time spent away from home
- Attitudinal changes – out of character interactions
- Lying
- Changes in communication – quality; duration; intimacy
- Avoidance
- Turning the tables to distract – accusing you of infidelity
- Indifference towards you and family
- Changes in your sex life – this can be an increase, decrease, novelty
- Financial issues – being secretive about abnormal expenditure
- Change in technology use – more time online or furtive use of mobile phones
- As you can see, some of these signs can be seen as at odds with one another.
The list is a range of possibilities, showing how different signs can be from one person to the next.
Do note that none of these signs guarantee that the reason for change in behaviour is due to infidelity. However, they may offer some guidelines.
Infidelity can be worked through. Gottman Method Couples Counselling offers a research based approach to working through infidelity.
If infidelity has been causing a ruptured relationship you may consider contacting Chapman Marques Psychology & Relationship Counselling for assistance.